A phone booth. A Delorian. A mail box. A Notebook. All really cool ways of navigating time. I just saw “The Lake House”,so I have time travel on my mind. I know what you are thinking. But before you yell at me let me say this: I had a FREE ticket AND it was FREE small popcorn Tuesday for anyone with a moviegoer card – SO, I didn’t pay to see a Keanu Reeves film. Now, back to the subject at hand: Time Travel.
People in time travel films are always attempting to fix things, or track down that ever elusive character called love, or Amore to you frenchies. In scientific films like the Star Trek series or The Time Machine the time traveling is very technical or spacey…a big machine that spins and breathes sparks and smoke or a “worm hole” that brings you out on the other side in another time. Romantic films on the other hand are far less logical: A magic mailbox sends letters back and forth, postage free, two years away…which is good because if that house was real there is no way the postal service would haul their lazy behinds all the way out there for mail. No way. There is nothing within miles of this (literal) glass house. Sandy and Keanu would have had to have a magical PO Box. But I guess a movie called “The PO Box” isn’t as romantic. Anyway, I digress. Where was I … right… “Somewhere In Time” is another one. Superman can time travel by sheer will! He goes out and buys an old fashioned suit and some antique coins and thinks real hard about “her” and BAM! He’s there…Somewhere in Time. So here’s the question…if anyone can do it; what if it’s possible, AND what if we are being fucked with RIGHT NOW!?
Seriously! We wouldn’t know! What if that car accident that you should have died in was actually interviened by some outside, time traveling force? Have you ever thought about that? What if all of lifes wierd little coincidences are actually people time traveling? It could happen. If it is true I want someone to take their suped up Deleoran to 88 mph and reform our medical insurance. I know that there are far better uses of a time machine, but this hits home for me today.
I left work early because my sinuses (again) were bothering me. I got home and to my surprise I scored an appointment – same day! Sweet! I got there, filled out all of the invasive paperwork and the nurse lady called my name.
“You’ll need to pay your copay & deductable now.”
“Okay, ” I say as I reach for my $20.
“That will be $250.”
I left in tears and didn’t look back. That’s how I ended up at the movies. That’s how I ended up wishing I could travel to a time where they don’t take money from your paycheck every month for health insurance, and then when you go to use said insurance you have to pay ON TOP OF THAT. Ah yes…if I had the ability to traverse time I would sit in on a few congressional meeting about health care, maybe make some HMO motherfucker experience a hefty deductable for no good reason, or maybe just maybe I’d have a glass of Merlot with Keanu and Sandy at the Lake House.