I Know Nothing. But If I Did…

What I know for sure. A lot of magazines have a column about that. Esquire has a column called “What I’ve learned” in which different celebrities, politicians and other folks of note tell – you guessed it – what they have learned so far in life. Oprah’s magazine has a similar column called “What I know for sure”, in which the Oprah scribes her thoughts about what she knows about various subjects. I have been inspired to do the same thing here. I mean a blog is sort of your own personal magazine right? Minus the horoscopes, fashion tips and make up ads. And, who would want fashion tips from me?! Anyway, although the Buddhist would say that the educated man knows that he knows nothing – I agree with that – but I kind of want to make the list anyway. Here is what I have learned, what I know for sure…so far…

·I like making lists.
·Love and sex? People have died for love, but merely paid for sex.
·If you stop learning you stop growing. And if you stop growing you die.
·If you sing the song “Stairway to Heaven” at a Karaoke bar people should have the right to beat you silly with old Led Zeppelin albums and concert tees.
·It doesn’t matter what anyone else thinks.
·I believe in wishing on stars. I do it often. I wished upon Gwenyth Paltrow just last night.
·If Oprah were President there would be no war and an end to hunger. Period.
·I make a lot of mistakes.
·Americans are waiting to be led – by anyone.
·Every man and woman should own a vibrator.
.People who say sex means nothing or it’s just sex, are missing out – or doing it wrong.
·Organized religion is for men and women with no vision or creativity. Women in organized religion are merely second-class citizens.
·I think most people are on auto pilot and afraid of effecting real change in their own lives. We are conditioned to be the worker bees in an “Ikea” society. We want it in a box and easy to put together. And we want it to look just like everyone else’s. Fight Club says it best: You are NOT a special and unique snowflake. But you could be!
·I am lonesome a lot, but not lonely. I have books.
·Everyone wants be thought of as attractive. The first step is for YOU to think so.
·It takes real courage and faith to really love someone. Those two things cannot exist where there is fear or possession.
·I like having sex with a man who is good at it…He knows who he is.

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4 thoughts on “I Know Nothing. But If I Did…

  1. I know very little but if I did I would 1) make a child laugh 2) jump really high 3) laugh at my foolishnesses 4) believe in my friends 5) savor my enemies 6)release myself from past regrets 7)learn to read the subtle messages from the universal marmoset 8)follow my own lead 9) say thank you and may I have another and 10) stop thinking so much.(Did I say thinking? I meant drinking,drinking.)

  2. I know very little but if I did I would 1) make a child laugh 2) jump really high 3) laugh at my foolishnesses 4) believe in my friends 5) savor my enemies 6)release myself from past regrets 7)learn to read the subtle messages from the universal marmoset 8)follow my own lead 9) say thank you and may I have another and 10) stop thinking so much.(Did I say thinking? I meant drinking,drinking.)

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