Why I am Divorcing Denzel

You expect cinematic crap when a movie comes out staring Jessica Alba, Jessica Beil, Sarah Jessica Parker – well, just about any actor with Jessica in their name. You don’t think you are going to see a “Great” film when it stars Katherine Heigel or Eddie Murphy. If you choose to spend your money on movies with these types of stars, then you deserve what you pay for. Personally, I think you should cut out the middle man, pop a bag of Jiffy pop, pour a big glass of soda and flush your $10 straight down the toilet. But that’s just me.

But when you choose to see a film with “Academy Award Winners” in them, you expect a little more. And you should. But there are a small group of actors wo know this and are taking advantage of you and your wallet. They are the deceptive actors, the actors who were ONCE great and are now resting on their haunches and basically phoning in every movie they make. And when they TRY, when they actually try to “act” the results are unbearable. I give you: Al Pachino and Robert DeNiro.

And I’d like to add a name to that list: Denzel Washington.

Will someone Please, PLEASE tell Denzel to stop? It’s over man. Over. Every time I watch a new movie with him in it, I have to go back and re-watch “Glory” just to get the stink off of me. His newest venture “The Book of Eli” was the straw that broke this camels back. It is yet another post- apocalyptic movie about a lone wanderer who kicks all kinds of ass and tries to save the world…and SOULS! That’s right kids – SOULS! He is the last person in the entire world to have a Bible and that makes all the surviving bad dudes mad…because they want the Bible. Hey, I didn’t write it.

Somewhere along the way Denzel just stopped trying. He made a string of movies where all he did was don a pair of dark sunglasses and a black leather jacket and walk around like a bad ass. (Training Day, Out of Time, Man on Fire, Inside Man, Taking of Pelham 123…) My point is – he used to be a reputable actor, and now he gets away with total crap because of his celebrity. The man has made tons of movies…but…what have you done for me lately Denzel?

It gets my gander up because I like movies. I like going to movies and talking about them. And I am finding it harder and harder to talk about movies with anyone because people nowadays can’t seem to differentiate the crap from the cream. When peoples expectations get lowered they tend to not aim very high at all. And if our “great” actors are giving us shit…what are we supposed to do? I’ll tell you what – stop paying them. I have threatened this before, but I mean it this time. I will no longer go see a movie with Denzel Washington in it. It’s not much, but unlike Denzel I put my money where my mouth is.

If more of our talented actors would insist on good films (like Meryl Streep) then I would be happy. Until then we are going to be stuck with Denzel Washington telling us to read the Bible. And that dear readers is not a world I wish to live in.

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3 thoughts on “Why I am Divorcing Denzel

  1. Well, I might check out a Denzel movie if it was free, but you're right, he hasn't done anything in quite a while that's worth the price of admission. Too bad, I still think he's hunky.

  2. Pingback: Whitest Oscars? | Prague Blog!

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