Stupid Cupid

Before I even get started I want to go on record as stating that I am not one of those people who “hate” Valentine’s Day. How can you hate a holiday all about love and romance? But, I guess I should also go on record saying that I don’t “love” Valentine’s Day either. I am pretty much ambivalent when it comes to the hearts and flowers holiday, but I wouldn’t say no to a Valentine.

All of my Czech students and friends have always claimed to loathe the holiday because it is “a made up holiday” with “no history”. I also hear that it is a Hallmark holiday and has no real significance. Well, I got news for you Pavel… and Lenka and all three Jana’s – ALL holidays are pretty much “made up”, and Valentines Day does indeed have a history. I’d tell you all about it, but you can use the internet just as easily as I can. Anyway, I don’t see the point in wasting energy hating something as harmless as Valentine’s Day when you could be stuffing your face with candy hearts and chocolates. Not to mention that I don’t see anybody overlooking Christmas or Thanksgiving because they are commercialized and “made up”.

The majority of my Valentine’s Days have been spent working. I always earned a ton of money as a server on Valentine’s Day. You would be surprised how many schmucks will shell out a tiny fortune for one dinner that would cost them half the amount if they just held off til the 15th. And come on, how obvious is a dinner date on Valentine’s Day? You want your special guy or gal to REALLY think you are cool? Then you need to step up your game. And I have a few tips for ya…

  1. Make something – ANYTHING. It can be a card, or a mix tape mixed CD. It can be a cool video that you make, or a stuffed lion. How about you MAKE dinner? Write a silly poem or draw a picture. Make a T-Shirt that says something deep and meaningful like, “I Love You More Than Bacon.”
  2. Steer clear of restaurants – I have worked at a few restaurants and I’ll tell you a secret: They make the prices higher on Valentine’s Day. Don’t do it. Go the day before or the day after and save some cash. Also, if you don’t like fancy food, don’t go to a fancy restaurant. What good is eating Pan-seared black cod with seafood sausage tagine, preserved lemon, couscous and green olives if you have no clue what that is? Don’t try to impress someone by spending money on fancy food. Go get a burger, you’ll both be happier. 
  3. Single? So what! – What a great excuse to have a house party. Invite over a few of your friends (single or couples) and have a Prom. Or a dinner party. Or go Trick or Treating and confuse the shit out of your neighbors. Just have fun! Valentine’s Day doesn’t have to be about couples gazing into each others eyes over candlelight and chocolate cake, it can be about couples going out and having a good time with their friends – single or not. 
  4. Movie Night – That’s right, stay home and watch movies. How awesome would it be to not have to get dressed up and go out? Order a pizza (with love), grab a bottle (or two) of wine and throw on a few classic romance movies like “Casablanca”, “An Affair to Remember” or “RoboCop”. You’ll have fun snuggling next to your sweetie and it will be just as romantic as going out. Except you don’t have to tip the valet. 

And I guess that’s about it. If anything gets through here, let it be this: Don’t hate on the holiday. There is nothing wrong with showing a little romance, love and affection to somebody. Try and remember how exciting it was to get those cheesy Valentine’s back when you were a kid, and hold on to that feeling. Wouldn’t it be a lot cooler to be happy than angry? It doesn’t have to be the worst day of the year… unless you want it to be. 

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