This Week’s Obsession: Law & Order SVU

I have a serious problem. It’s a beautiful warm, sunny day and all I want to do is sit in my flat and watch consecutive episodes of Law & Order: Special Victims Unit. I’m not kidding. My windows are open and I can hear all the people outside enjoying the nice day but I can’t seem to tear myself away from what I now refer to as “The Ice-T Show” or “That Rape Show”, because let’s be honest that’s what it is. I was late to the party on this one. I hear that people have been enjoying this show for something like 12 years. Me, only about one year. But I am a quick study and I am catching up fast.

Actually, I can’t get enough. If I have any free time I am more likely than not watching Ice T and the gang make a bust or catch a perp. See? I totally know all the lingo. I have given this a lot of thought and I am still not able to come up with a valid reason for liking this show. I mean, let’s be honest – it’s not very good. The writing is predictable and silly and the acting is overdone. But for some strange reason those seem to be the exact reasons why I DO like the show. I get really excited every time I hear Ice – T make a statement like this: “Well, I guess flesh is worth more than produce.” In what context would anyone ever say that? I think his character is there just to help the stoned people with the plot. He is always summing up the long conversation that just happened. He gets all the most absurd lines and delivers them like he is just learning to read. It is awesome. 

Another one of my favorite parts of the show is Marishka Hargitay. I love her attempts to be both lonely and tough, kind and badass. If I am ever abused I hope she is there to hold my hand. Literally. I get a big smile when I see Detective Benson make a smug comment, look thoughtfully at someone (anyone, or even just a computer or a chair) and walk out of the room. She is so good at leaving a room. Maybe she just hates rooms.

My favorite thing about the show is the constant barrage of “Special Guest Stars” that is paraded through the precinct. I’ve seen Jeremy Irons as an alcoholic sex addict who councils other addicts. I have seen Cynthia Nixon display MPD, Andrew McCarthy as a rich dude who keeps a sex slave locked under his bed, and I have even seen Debra Messing as a tough journalist who nails cyber pervs on National television. It’s pretty awesome watching these “notable” stars flex their acting muscles as they cry, scream and emote their way through 45 minutes of gut wrenching drama.

Maybe this is just a phase I am going through, or maybe this is the beginning of the end for me. Maybe this is the start of a downward spiral into horrible taste in entertainment. Next thing you know I’ll be blogging about Celebrity Apprentice and CSI Las Vegas. Lord, I hope not. I hope it begins and ends with The Ice T show because I really it can’t get any better, and it really can’t get any worse.

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